The #MeToo campaign began on social media with a message exhorting women to write Me Too if they had faced sexual abuse/assault. The message read, “Me too… If all the women who have been sexually harassed or assaulted wrote ‘Me too’ as a status, we might give people a sense of the magnitude of the problem. Please copy/paste.” Soon world over, women started sharing stories of sexual abuse that they have faced in their lives. Gaylaxy asked its readers to share their #MeToo stories, and within minutes our inbox was flooded with them. We are publishing the stories that we have received so far.
Nothing could be worse than what I felt at the age of 10. It still haunts me. My agile self was so cheerful in those Summer vacations of 2007. My fate brought me to the demon. He squeezed my bliss, my wishes, my health out of me. Not only did he touch me inappropriately but he alarmed my mental and physical health for a long period of time (For almost 3 years). I still remember the days, I used to cry over silly things for hours. My studies were hampered and so was my inner peace. I had a rough phase. I had to face depression before I could learn the meaning of word ‘Depression’. But I could not share my suffering. It is time to raise our voice.
A Voice – against perversion, humiliation, exploitation, sexual deviance, harassment, teasing and to the hard times we all had. #RaiseYourVoice
When I was in class 6, around 11 years old, I had gone to a mela (fair) with my mother. It was extremely crowded. My mother and I were standing in a queue to enter the mela, when all of a sudden I felt someone grab my boob from behind and press it. I looked back immediately, but since it was so crowded I couldn’t locate the molester. I remained silent throughout the evening without telling a word to my mother. I regret not having raised my voice at that time. This is my #MeToo story
– Anonymous, (Lesbian, now 22)
I’m a 21 year old Artist and college student from Chennai. I’m Gay. I know about my sexuality since the age of 18. But I would get confused about my sexual orientation because I was sexually abused by a man. Later I get to know, that was not the reason for my sexual orientation. Yes, I was sexually abused by a neighbourhood man of 28 yrs at the age of 10. I still remember that night, when I was asked to sit in his lap due to lack of space in our car while returning from a marriage function. Taking advantage of the dim light, despite the presence of my parents, he slowly put his hand into my pant’s zip. I don’t know how he had the courage to do that in a running car filled with lots of people including my parents. At that moment I didn’t know how to react, but after reaching home I noticed that my pant’s zip was open and I ran into my home with fear. That night I told my mother what had happened, but she neglected the incident saying, “He was just kidding.” From the next day, he used to give me a weird smile. Since that incident I refused to see him, I even quit passing through the way where he stood. But he was waiting for a good opportunity to get me completely. One day while my parents were away, somebody knocked at the door. I was shocked to see that it was him. I opened the door and he came into my room and started giving me a blow job. At that tender age, I didn’t know what he was doing to me and this continued for some years whenever my mom left me alone in home under his supervision, since he had a mechanic shop next to my home. I only got the courage to say No to him at the age of 18. Yes, #MeToo.
Sexual abuse might happen to anyone and at any age, one should be strong enough to say NO when they get to know the thing happening to him/her is wrong. For all the child abusers – Children are not the right choice to quench your sexual pleasure, there are so many sources available, choose the right one, not the pretty child.
Going through my childhood and growing up in an Indian household, I never got the talk I needed about what sexual harassment is. I didn’t even know that this kind of act of scarring someone mentally and physically for a mere amount of pleasure existed till I experienced it. I was feminine (and still am), maybe that gave them the power to molest me. I used to sleep alone in my bedroom and in the middle of the night I’d feel sweat and saliva dripping on me , I’d feel a tight closure around me and felt like I could never get out of that. I was just 10 and skinny. It would hurt like hell when a well built adult would tightly grope me and push me down on bed, sometimes I didn’t even resist. I’d want him to put so much pressure that I’d die at that moment, but I could never figure out how to tell someone or get help. I was like a helpless victim left to suffocate and die. I tried to tell my father but he didn’t take much care. He just warned him not to slip into my bed at night, but he didn’t stop. I’d kick him but that hurt me even more. Then it stopped when I moved to university’s hostel but still when I come home and see him, I crack a little bit. Now I am 18, still not out of closet and fighting a battle with myself to procrastinate my coming out with a scared mind.
I am Sourav, living in Krishnagar, West Bengal. For the last few days I have been seeing various posts and reading stories about sexual harassment of different people under the “Me too” campaign. I don’t have the courage to tell everyone that yes I am also a victim, that’s why I am writing this down. I was 3 or 4 years old then or probably less than that. He is my cousin, 14 years older than me. He would insist that I touch his private part whenever he got a chance. After that I don’t know how and when I became used to that practice. Or may be I also started enjoying it. I did not know what was exactly happening with me, nor was I totally aware about the consequences. May be at some point I also was enjoying that pain, don’ know how and why??? Finally when I was 16 I realized that what had been happening to me was wrong. I can’t look at him now, can’t even talk to him. I don’t know how you will see this but I’m even not sure whether I should tag this story of my life as “me too”!!! Now I am 23 , happy with my life. But struggling inside every single day to come out as gay. But I can’t do that until I secure a good job and become independent.
Latest posts by Gaylaxy (see all)
- Indian Gay Feature Film about Mother-Son Bond Wins Top Award at Chicago South Asian Film Festival - October 1, 2018
- The Politics of Section 377, IPC (An Excerpt from the book ‘Criminal Love? Queer Theory, Culture, and Politics in India’) - September 22, 2018
- Watch: The Coming Out Story of Gaylaxy Founder Sukhdeep Singh (And How the 2009 Delhi High Court Judgement Helped Him Find Acceptance) - September 19, 2018