We are a group of eligible bachelors in monogamous, committed and loving relationships and are waiting for the auspicious day when we can get married. We seek your approval…
The story so far
It takes twenty six years of silence, six months of rebellion and six days of dark celebrations to get six decades of betrayal. That is the life of an individual who is denied the right to marry the person of his choice (read: gender). Having the desire to be with the man of his dreams, every gay man in India from adolescence grows up fearing the day when his family would force him to marry a girl for a larger societal acceptance.
What do the two individuals get?
The man ends up frustrated of living the “lie” and discontinues the relationship emotionally and obviously physically. The woman either does not know the reason of her miseries at home or lives a life of denial.
What do the families get?
- Social acceptance of an unhappily married couple. (Is that what holy matrimony should be?)
- A frustrated wife/ husband looking for a partner online.
So why are gay marriages opposed in India?
For a moment, let us consider some of the reasons people give when opposing same-sex marriage. They say that this would promote homosexuality in the society and spoil the culture. But sexual preferences cannot be learnt or forced; it is an individual’s nature. Having heterosexuals around for so many years has never inspired me to be what they say- straight. On the other hand, social acceptance of gay relationships would prevent individuals from a lot of mental stress and despair.
Another major reason we hear is that a “gay marriage” is not natural. Well, let us point out here that in my opinion, marriage itself is not natural. Catching cold, having sex, eating food, birth and death are natural, whereas clothing, houses, rockets, TV sets are “not natural”. We do not see marriage “occurring in nature”. Marriage is a human norm created by some humans considering perhaps only the majority of population. The minority has ever since been ignored.
Now some religious people might say that their religion is against gay sex or gay marriage. We typically stay away from religious arguments in order to not hurt anyone’s religious sentiments, and being religious people ourselves it is expected from those who oppose me marrying my Love. However, we must mention that a reminder on what Krishna preached to Arjuna throughout the Bhagwat Gita- to act according to his nature, both spiritually and materially. We all have been made by Nature, unique in our own way, and a perfect harmony with the Mother Nature is achieved only when we act according to our individual nature. We feel right, things feel right.
The modifications in the Section 377 of Indian Constitution allows me and my partner to live happily ever after without the fear of being accused of illegal gay sex, yet the desire to marry my Love remains impossible in this country so far. Legal acceptance of our sexuality is very different from the society not frowning upon us. Just like many people discourage live-in relationships keeping high the value of the institution of marriage, homosexuals also respect the commitment of a beautiful relationship that they want to get through marriage. We want to show the world that we are not just in a relationship for sex allowed by 377, we truly love the person and want to grow old with him. We want to raise kids and shower love to them just like any other unfortunately incapable couple does.
Why we stayed in India?
We could have flown abroad and married like many others we know did, but we choose to be in our beloved India and work to get our rights.
At this stage, we need to gather support from You, yes YOU our friends, who have cared enough for us to read this far. There are many norms that have changed in our country over the years like the sati system, dowry and purdah. “Heterosexual-only marriage” is another such norm. Our country needs to discontinue this restriction in order to let all its citizens breathe free. We want you to be aware of the distress we go through when hiding our identity and understand that our desire to be with the person of the same gender is natural and loving. We need our friends to speak in our favor next time someone talks of denying us our right to get married.
We are in a monogamous, committed and loving relationship and are waiting for the auspicious day when we can get married. We want a future safe and secure for our family and our society. Me, my loving husband, our children, parents and You, our dear neighbors.
Join hands with us
We seek your approval. If you support us, you can show your approval by liking the Facebook Page-http://www.facebook.com/SupportGayMarriagesInIndia